I don't know how often you visit our blog, but I'm guessing you have noticed the "Chip In" widget on the right side of the screen. I sent the below email message to some folks earlier this week. It has been a very humbling thing to do, but perhaps that is part of what we are supposed to be learning here.
Ayúdenos, por favor
Translation: Help us, please.
We have debated about doing something like this. We’ve swallowed our pride, and here we are. We need help. I know, you didn’t ask us to adopt HG. It’s not your problem. You didn’t ask us to make a temporary move to Guatemala this summer, pushing to complete HG’s adoption. It’s not your problem. But, we are reaching out to you as our friends to help us with our problem. We are out of money.
History
When we began HG’s adoption in December 2007 and she still lived at the orphanage where HM and HV lived as babies, we made an agreement with the owner/director of that facility on the fees for HG’s adoption. These fees were GREATLY reduced and the payment would be due at the conclusion of the adoption. We surpassed this fee long ago. Our adoption of HG was not initiated because we desired to have 3 children. We began her adoption because we knew that Guatemalan adoptions were ending, that HG needed a family, that HG would not be able to get the therapies and help she needs in Guatemala, and, most important, we felt that God was calling us to be that family for her.
In May 2008, that original orphanage filed to move HG out of their care and she was transferred to another orphanage in Guatemala City. For the first 7 months that HG lived at this orphanage, I purchased $200 worth of supplies (rice, beans, powdered milk, formula, shampoo, Incaparina (a nutritious cereal drink), and/or diapers) and had them delivered to the orphanage. In February 2009, the orphanage decided that I had not helped them enough (even though they would tell me what to purchase each month), that I owed them a back payment of $1000 and owed them $200/month for the care of HG which I had to pay through and including July 2009 (even though HG lived there for only 15 days). So, my total paid to them for care that was barely adequate was $3600 through money and supplies. Many of you gave supplies to this orphanage as well which I carried down to them. It’s disheartening to know that the orphanage was ungrateful of these things at the end of our relationship, but I have to remember the little boy at the orphanage telling me “O! Es mi favorito!” while excitedly pointing at the 4 boxes of Cheerios that I had just given to the home. That made it worth it.
In January 2009, HM and I made a trip to Guatemala to celebrate HG’s 4th Birthday as well as meet with as many officials that we could in order to help push to begin HG’s adoption case. See, even though we began the adoption procedure in December 2007, the case only began in June 2009. During this January trip, HG had an appointment with a US Embassy panel physician (a Guatemalan doctor that completed medical training in both Guatemala and the US and is approved by the US Embassy). His first question was WHY is this kid still in Guatemala? He wanted to write a medical certification for HG’s file, asking for the process to be expedited in all aspects of the adoption due to her medical issues. In order to write this letter adequately, however, he needed more testing to be done and other physicians to examine her. We saw a pediatric neurologist (also a US Embassy panel physician) who ordered a MRI to be done on HG’s brain. Praise the Lord this scan proved that nothing is wrong with the cognitive portions of her brain, only her cerebellum which governs her equilibrium. We also saw a pediatric ophthalmologist who changed HG’s glasses prescription and so new pair of glasses were ordered as well as a patching regimen to strengthen the vision that she does have. There is another upcoming appointment with this same pediatric ophthalmologist to reassess HG’s progress and vision. While all of these things did give us more information on HG’s future, it all had a price tag. None of this was covered by our insurance and was paid out of pocket, totaling about $1600 in just 2 days. We had to provide yet another medical certification to the Family Court in July 2009 due to HG’s developmental delays which cost another $150 to obtain.
Through this all, we have continued to have things happen here within our family in TX as well. In April 2009, J had surgery on her spine/neck, inserting a metal plate to stabilize some disc issues and severe neck pain. During the preparation scans for that procedure, they detected a growth on her lungs. She’s had to do two follow up CT scans and, thank the Lord, they have shown to be nothing at this point. The last scan showed, however, something on her liver and now a MRI of the liver is ordered for next week. When it rains, it pours. While we are thankful that we do have health insurance here for all of us, there out of pocket expenses that come with these procedures. And, at a time when we don’t have the funds to cover all of these expenses we have in our lives.
I’ve made 9 trips to Guatemala since December 2007 for this adoption procedure. Just as a point of reference, for HV and HM’s adoptions, we made 1 trip for each child—just the one to pick them up. I’ve spent 84 nights in Guatemala during this time period, having to pay for lodging on each of those nights. Having no car in Guatemala, I have to pay for in-country/ground transportation with taxis or buses which can total up to $100/day. Even when I am not in Guatemala, there are times when I have to pay for this transportation to get HG to various appointments. I do have to eat while in Guatemala too even though I do typically take some “portable” foods or snacks from home so that I don’t have to spend too much (I did lose 15 pounds during our temporary move there in July/August 2009).
We have pulled money from all of the places that we can. We sold our lake house/cabin that we adored. We sold our jet ski in May 2009. We reduced our cell phone plan. We cut our home telephone line down to the absolute basics. We’ve both pulled money from our retirement accounts. Heck, I’ve even started making our own laundry detergent to save money! We don’t have enough. My trip to Guatemala last week for one night cost over $600. The DNA testing and paperwork that we are doing now will cost over $900 by the time we are done with preparing the paperwork both here and in Guatemala to submit to the Guatemalan legal system. Remember the lab sending the DNA sample collection kit the first time and it couldn’t be used because it was not put in double envelopes? That error cost us $58 in shipping fees. A little here. A little there. It all adds up. We pay people to do their job, naturally, but we’ve also had to pay people “to quit” doing their job even though they weren’t doing it to begin with! That’s really crazy! We have had over $3000 in these type of payments (not mention the fees for the attorneys that ARE indeed working). J’s theory is that people that work in adoptions in Guatemala know and realize that their income is gone and so they are milking all they can out of those of us that are left in the system with open cases. That very well may be true, but it doesn’t change the fact that we have had to pay the fees required in order to get this case completed.
We have paid for many of the above expenses with a credit card and the bills are here. We, therefore, still owe the money paid for the expenses. While we realize that using credit cards is not always a wise thing to do, it is often necessary since we have to pay expenses in Guatemala while we are in the US.
Here’s a complete listing of where we stand:
Savings: We have $2000 in our savings account for the remainder of the adoption.
Expenses: Here’s a listing of what we have left to pay:
$3600 legal fees for attorney, DG. I do not even know what I will owe RM because I pay her an hourly fee, not a flat fee like I do for DG. I probably will end up owing her another $1000 total if I had to guess.
$600 2nd DNA, Visa Medical, and Visa to bring HG home
For every month that HG stays in Guatemala, it costs us a minimum of $650 for her foster care and her preschool. We paid for September, but October is just around the corner and HG isn’t with us yet. So, we are gearing up to need to pay this again soon.
Return airline tickets to Guatemala. We will have to secure a one way ticket too for HG when she flies home with us. We have made most of our trips in the last 2 years flying standby. That can be rather “scary” when you are ready to get out of the country—now—and so we would rather not return flying standby. We do have some airline miles with American Airlines, but we do not have enough miles for even two roundtrip tickets (at this point, we think it will be J and myself only going to pick up HG so that HG can begin to acquaint herself with J since I will have to return to work full time shortly after arriving home with her. It would be ideal if we could all go, but we cannot afford to do that).
We cannot and will not give up on HG. When J and I agreed that the little girls and I would make the temporary move to Guatemala for the summer, we felt that we could take the financial hit of doing this if it meant that the time and energy we spend routinely on the adoption were over. As you know, however, we returned home “empty handed.” I could not afford to lose my job and so the return was necessary and dictated by that. Leaving HG in Guatemala has been devastating. I miss her so much. HM and HV miss her. They speak of her and ask about her daily. I realized I would have to make a return trip to Guatemala when HG’s mom was not able to come to that 1st DNA appointment, requiring us to reschedule. I didn’t know, however, that they would reschedule it for the very next week since it took them almost 3 weeks to schedule it the first time. If I had known that, we would have waited one more week. There’s simply no way to really predict these things. I HOPE that I don’t have to go back to Guatemala again until HG’s adoption is complete and we can bring her home, but it is a real possibility that I will have to do so since I am her legal guardian. Yes, we have a friend that works for American that can help us some with the tickets BUT he is running out of standby “vouchers” for this year because I have single-handedly used almost all of the ones he is allotted.
So, how can you help us?
1. It’s a mess and we are stressed out about it. If you are able to help us financially, big or small, to finish up this adoption, we would be grateful. It feels so silly for me to even type those words. I feel like I need to apologize for even asking you all, but we do not know what else to do. I don’t mind asking people for money IF the money is going to a worthy cause, like when I did the Breast Cancer Walks, but this is different for me. I know that many people are financially strapped and times are tough for almost everyone. We just don’t know where else to turn except to people like you. I have set up an account with “Chip In.” This system uses pay pal and you can make a secure online donation to HG’s adoption fund by using the link here off of the blog. If you are uncomfortable using the “Chip In” system and would rather make a donation through the mail, please let me know and I can send you our mailing address.
2. Donating or purchasing airline miles on American Airlines would also be helpful. American has a direct flight to/from DFW Airport to Guatemala City daily and returning with HG will be done in the easiest way if we can fly direct.
3. We are open to any other sort of ideas that people might have—fundraisers, grant programs, direct lines to the Fairy Godmother or a supplier of the coveted Money Tree. If you have an idea, let me know!
4. Prayers. This adoption has challenged us in so many ways. We would have not made it this far without strength, wisdom, and peace from God. Please continue to pray for us, for HG as she is separated from us, for those people with the Guatemalan government and the US Embassy that make decisions regarding HG, and for our dear friends caring for HG currently in Guatemala.
We are so grateful for all of your friendship and support. We feel firmly that God called us to adopt HG and for her to be part of our family. We know that God will provide and perhaps humility is part of what we are supposed to be learning during this arduous and lengthy process.
Love to all,
K and J
Ayúdenos, por favor
Translation: Help us, please.
We have debated about doing something like this. We’ve swallowed our pride, and here we are. We need help. I know, you didn’t ask us to adopt HG. It’s not your problem. You didn’t ask us to make a temporary move to Guatemala this summer, pushing to complete HG’s adoption. It’s not your problem. But, we are reaching out to you as our friends to help us with our problem. We are out of money.
History
When we began HG’s adoption in December 2007 and she still lived at the orphanage where HM and HV lived as babies, we made an agreement with the owner/director of that facility on the fees for HG’s adoption. These fees were GREATLY reduced and the payment would be due at the conclusion of the adoption. We surpassed this fee long ago. Our adoption of HG was not initiated because we desired to have 3 children. We began her adoption because we knew that Guatemalan adoptions were ending, that HG needed a family, that HG would not be able to get the therapies and help she needs in Guatemala, and, most important, we felt that God was calling us to be that family for her.
In May 2008, that original orphanage filed to move HG out of their care and she was transferred to another orphanage in Guatemala City. For the first 7 months that HG lived at this orphanage, I purchased $200 worth of supplies (rice, beans, powdered milk, formula, shampoo, Incaparina (a nutritious cereal drink), and/or diapers) and had them delivered to the orphanage. In February 2009, the orphanage decided that I had not helped them enough (even though they would tell me what to purchase each month), that I owed them a back payment of $1000 and owed them $200/month for the care of HG which I had to pay through and including July 2009 (even though HG lived there for only 15 days). So, my total paid to them for care that was barely adequate was $3600 through money and supplies. Many of you gave supplies to this orphanage as well which I carried down to them. It’s disheartening to know that the orphanage was ungrateful of these things at the end of our relationship, but I have to remember the little boy at the orphanage telling me “O! Es mi favorito!” while excitedly pointing at the 4 boxes of Cheerios that I had just given to the home. That made it worth it.
In January 2009, HM and I made a trip to Guatemala to celebrate HG’s 4th Birthday as well as meet with as many officials that we could in order to help push to begin HG’s adoption case. See, even though we began the adoption procedure in December 2007, the case only began in June 2009. During this January trip, HG had an appointment with a US Embassy panel physician (a Guatemalan doctor that completed medical training in both Guatemala and the US and is approved by the US Embassy). His first question was WHY is this kid still in Guatemala? He wanted to write a medical certification for HG’s file, asking for the process to be expedited in all aspects of the adoption due to her medical issues. In order to write this letter adequately, however, he needed more testing to be done and other physicians to examine her. We saw a pediatric neurologist (also a US Embassy panel physician) who ordered a MRI to be done on HG’s brain. Praise the Lord this scan proved that nothing is wrong with the cognitive portions of her brain, only her cerebellum which governs her equilibrium. We also saw a pediatric ophthalmologist who changed HG’s glasses prescription and so new pair of glasses were ordered as well as a patching regimen to strengthen the vision that she does have. There is another upcoming appointment with this same pediatric ophthalmologist to reassess HG’s progress and vision. While all of these things did give us more information on HG’s future, it all had a price tag. None of this was covered by our insurance and was paid out of pocket, totaling about $1600 in just 2 days. We had to provide yet another medical certification to the Family Court in July 2009 due to HG’s developmental delays which cost another $150 to obtain.
Through this all, we have continued to have things happen here within our family in TX as well. In April 2009, J had surgery on her spine/neck, inserting a metal plate to stabilize some disc issues and severe neck pain. During the preparation scans for that procedure, they detected a growth on her lungs. She’s had to do two follow up CT scans and, thank the Lord, they have shown to be nothing at this point. The last scan showed, however, something on her liver and now a MRI of the liver is ordered for next week. When it rains, it pours. While we are thankful that we do have health insurance here for all of us, there out of pocket expenses that come with these procedures. And, at a time when we don’t have the funds to cover all of these expenses we have in our lives.
I’ve made 9 trips to Guatemala since December 2007 for this adoption procedure. Just as a point of reference, for HV and HM’s adoptions, we made 1 trip for each child—just the one to pick them up. I’ve spent 84 nights in Guatemala during this time period, having to pay for lodging on each of those nights. Having no car in Guatemala, I have to pay for in-country/ground transportation with taxis or buses which can total up to $100/day. Even when I am not in Guatemala, there are times when I have to pay for this transportation to get HG to various appointments. I do have to eat while in Guatemala too even though I do typically take some “portable” foods or snacks from home so that I don’t have to spend too much (I did lose 15 pounds during our temporary move there in July/August 2009).
We have pulled money from all of the places that we can. We sold our lake house/cabin that we adored. We sold our jet ski in May 2009. We reduced our cell phone plan. We cut our home telephone line down to the absolute basics. We’ve both pulled money from our retirement accounts. Heck, I’ve even started making our own laundry detergent to save money! We don’t have enough. My trip to Guatemala last week for one night cost over $600. The DNA testing and paperwork that we are doing now will cost over $900 by the time we are done with preparing the paperwork both here and in Guatemala to submit to the Guatemalan legal system. Remember the lab sending the DNA sample collection kit the first time and it couldn’t be used because it was not put in double envelopes? That error cost us $58 in shipping fees. A little here. A little there. It all adds up. We pay people to do their job, naturally, but we’ve also had to pay people “to quit” doing their job even though they weren’t doing it to begin with! That’s really crazy! We have had over $3000 in these type of payments (not mention the fees for the attorneys that ARE indeed working). J’s theory is that people that work in adoptions in Guatemala know and realize that their income is gone and so they are milking all they can out of those of us that are left in the system with open cases. That very well may be true, but it doesn’t change the fact that we have had to pay the fees required in order to get this case completed.
We have paid for many of the above expenses with a credit card and the bills are here. We, therefore, still owe the money paid for the expenses. While we realize that using credit cards is not always a wise thing to do, it is often necessary since we have to pay expenses in Guatemala while we are in the US.
Here’s a complete listing of where we stand:
Savings: We have $2000 in our savings account for the remainder of the adoption.
Expenses: Here’s a listing of what we have left to pay:
$3600 legal fees for attorney, DG. I do not even know what I will owe RM because I pay her an hourly fee, not a flat fee like I do for DG. I probably will end up owing her another $1000 total if I had to guess.
$600 2nd DNA, Visa Medical, and Visa to bring HG home
For every month that HG stays in Guatemala, it costs us a minimum of $650 for her foster care and her preschool. We paid for September, but October is just around the corner and HG isn’t with us yet. So, we are gearing up to need to pay this again soon.
Return airline tickets to Guatemala. We will have to secure a one way ticket too for HG when she flies home with us. We have made most of our trips in the last 2 years flying standby. That can be rather “scary” when you are ready to get out of the country—now—and so we would rather not return flying standby. We do have some airline miles with American Airlines, but we do not have enough miles for even two roundtrip tickets (at this point, we think it will be J and myself only going to pick up HG so that HG can begin to acquaint herself with J since I will have to return to work full time shortly after arriving home with her. It would be ideal if we could all go, but we cannot afford to do that).
We cannot and will not give up on HG. When J and I agreed that the little girls and I would make the temporary move to Guatemala for the summer, we felt that we could take the financial hit of doing this if it meant that the time and energy we spend routinely on the adoption were over. As you know, however, we returned home “empty handed.” I could not afford to lose my job and so the return was necessary and dictated by that. Leaving HG in Guatemala has been devastating. I miss her so much. HM and HV miss her. They speak of her and ask about her daily. I realized I would have to make a return trip to Guatemala when HG’s mom was not able to come to that 1st DNA appointment, requiring us to reschedule. I didn’t know, however, that they would reschedule it for the very next week since it took them almost 3 weeks to schedule it the first time. If I had known that, we would have waited one more week. There’s simply no way to really predict these things. I HOPE that I don’t have to go back to Guatemala again until HG’s adoption is complete and we can bring her home, but it is a real possibility that I will have to do so since I am her legal guardian. Yes, we have a friend that works for American that can help us some with the tickets BUT he is running out of standby “vouchers” for this year because I have single-handedly used almost all of the ones he is allotted.
So, how can you help us?
1. It’s a mess and we are stressed out about it. If you are able to help us financially, big or small, to finish up this adoption, we would be grateful. It feels so silly for me to even type those words. I feel like I need to apologize for even asking you all, but we do not know what else to do. I don’t mind asking people for money IF the money is going to a worthy cause, like when I did the Breast Cancer Walks, but this is different for me. I know that many people are financially strapped and times are tough for almost everyone. We just don’t know where else to turn except to people like you. I have set up an account with “Chip In.” This system uses pay pal and you can make a secure online donation to HG’s adoption fund by using the link here off of the blog. If you are uncomfortable using the “Chip In” system and would rather make a donation through the mail, please let me know and I can send you our mailing address.
2. Donating or purchasing airline miles on American Airlines would also be helpful. American has a direct flight to/from DFW Airport to Guatemala City daily and returning with HG will be done in the easiest way if we can fly direct.
3. We are open to any other sort of ideas that people might have—fundraisers, grant programs, direct lines to the Fairy Godmother or a supplier of the coveted Money Tree. If you have an idea, let me know!
4. Prayers. This adoption has challenged us in so many ways. We would have not made it this far without strength, wisdom, and peace from God. Please continue to pray for us, for HG as she is separated from us, for those people with the Guatemalan government and the US Embassy that make decisions regarding HG, and for our dear friends caring for HG currently in Guatemala.
We are so grateful for all of your friendship and support. We feel firmly that God called us to adopt HG and for her to be part of our family. We know that God will provide and perhaps humility is part of what we are supposed to be learning during this arduous and lengthy process.
Love to all,
K and J
Your 3 girls are not so little anymore. Thanks for sharing photos. Am so proud of you for having the courage to put out your hand and ask for some help. My partner and I will be donating $150 this week. It is not as much as we wanted to give but I have been on state furloughs this year & might get more layoff days effective Oct. 1st. You helped us adopt our little girl and we will be forever grateful and are so happy to have her in our life. Hope you meet your financial needs & get HG home soon! Sincerely Downtown :>)
ReplyDeleteI have a bunch of unused AA miles I would love to donate to you... they no longer fly to our city. How does that work? Send me an email, 'kay?
ReplyDelete