All Saints Day

Sunday was All Saints Day, a day to remember those that have had their homecoming with the Lord. After receiving communion, there is time to light a candle yourself, remembering those that had passed this year or just anyone that has passed away. We lit a candle for my dear Gramps. If I had to name one person that I felt was the most Godly man I know, it would be my Gramps. He loved the Lord. Oh, how he loved the Lord. He was always singing, humming, or whistling a hymn. Even at his ripe ol' age, he was teaching 4 year old Sunday School in the last few years of his life! Gramps loved me too. And J. And our girls. We shared a love for peanut butter and anything that contained peanut butter. I remember asking him questions as a kid about God, theology, and such. Once I remember asking him to walk down the street with me one evening when they came to visit. I don't know how old I was, but I know I wasn't in elementary school just yet. My little neighbor friend had told me that day that her grandfather was going to have to cut down our favorite tree because it was diseased, needing "more to eat." I had saved part of my dinner to take to the tree, thinking that I could save it with my food. Gramps allowed me to put my food at the base of the tree but also told me that he didn't think that it would "cure" the tree. I remember that we prayed for the tree through my tears. While the tree didn't make it, I felt ok with things because we tried. I remember driving to Tyler where he lived when I was in high school and college, taking along a friend or two. I would play the piano (and I think I sang once too) for his adult Sunday School class that he directed with Mamaw. Mamaw went to see the pearly gates of heaven in September 2001. After she passed, Gramps continued his "work" at his church, delivering meals for Meals on Wheels, and many of his normal activities he did with Mamaw, BUT Gramps then took up dancing too. It became quite the joke that little Baptist Grampsie was cutting a rug with the senior citizen ladies! I remember calling him one time on my way home from work and he told me that he only had a minute to talk because he had a church meeting from 5:30-7:30 p.m. and THEN he was going dancing. He had more of a social schedule than me! Gramps suffered a stroke in November 2007 and then he moved to our area to live in an assisted living home for the last 10 months of his life (May 2008-March 2009). While I told him of our pending adoption of HG, I don't know that he ever "got it." I would tell him about her during my visits with him, and he would just smile. Most of you know that I'm a big cry baby. I can cry at a commercial. When we went to Tyler to see Gramps after his stroke, we had helped him get settled back into his bed for an afternoon nap after his therapies. J and the girls had left the room for me to say my goodbyes that day. Oh, I'm not good at goodbyes either. I started to cry. I took his hand and told him that I was sorry for crying. He looked up at me, and in his typical Grampsie fashion told me that I should NEVER apologize for showing emotions. He said that God gave us the ability to feel as humans and that I should use it. He reminded me that even Jesus wept and that Jesus knew what it was like to feel since He came to earth as a human. For me. Gramps assured me that he was going to be alright and he would be a "good boy." (I always used to ask him if he was being a good boy and continued to tell him to be a good boy once he moved to our area). Boy, I know I'll remember that one forever. My sweet, handsome Grampsie. (Yes, I'm weeping as I am typing this.). That was probably my last glimpse of "the ol' Gramps." At least it was my most memorable moment of him in his later years. One other thing that Gramps told me 10 years ago that has had a lasting impression on me is God's love is big enough for everyone. If God can love me, then he could love me too. So true. So true.

I know if "the ol' Gramps," the pre-stroke Gramps, were here during this almost 2 year long adoption ordeal for HG, he would have provided me with such great counsel. He would have prayed for me. He would have prayed for us. He would have prayed for HG. I KNOW he can see us and he watches over HG. That selfish side of me, however, wishes he were here to meet her when she comes home.